Thank you to Libro FM and Simon & Schuster Audio for a copy of Jennette McCurdy’s memoir, I’m Glad My Mom Died.
Nickelodeon child star Jennette McCurdy recounts a deeply troubled relationship with her mother, including emotional abuse that lead to a severe eating disorder. McCurdy’s mother had a long battle with reoccurring cancer, eventually passing away when McCurdy was in her twenties. McCurdy candidly explains the relief she felt with her mother gone and her struggle to overcome the toxicity of her upbringing.
I’m Glad My Mom Died is the hot non-fiction book of late summer 2022. I work as a bookseller and it is impossible to get in stock. Customers ask for it in hushed tones, as if saying the title aloud might bring bad luck. I don’t remember the last time a book has initiated so many interesting conversations.
I was drawn to the title. I had not previously heard of McCurdy, as she is a younger generation and I never watched her shows on Nickelodeon. A majority of the customers seeking her book are fans, however, you do not need to be a fan to appreciate her memoir. I’m generally drawn to non-fiction titles dealing with death and mother/daughter relationships, which is why the title, especially paired with the cover photo, made it appealing. Unlike McCurdy, I had a mostly wonderful relationship with my mom, but I can relate to that taboo sense of relief when a parent dies and you have the freedom of breaking away from your childhood, including family expectations.
This memoir is shocking! McCurdy’s mom uses her daughter as a proxy to chase after unfulfilled ambitions. McCurdy would do anything to please her mom and keep harmony in their household, which included relationship tension between her parents. In her focus on being a people-pleaser, McCurdy feels pressure to be perfect, including attending a strict schedule of extra-curricular classes aimed at improving her chances in Hollywood. McCurdy’s body is scrutinized as her mom, who also has an eating disorder, is proud of her daughter’s restrictive eating. The calorie restriction is not only to keep McCurdy thin, but to help delay puberty and keep her looking young to book kid parts. McCurdy develops a fear of puberty. McCurdy uses humor to lighten the topics and perhaps to deflect from truly difficult memories. Her pacing and sarcasm made me laugh. She has a strong comedic sensibility, but ultimately her memoir just made me feel really sad for her situation.
The feeling of hope comes towards the end, after her mother dies. McCurdy can finally let go of toxic relationships, not only the one with her mother, and make efforts to change her self-destructive tendencies. She feels empowered to make positive choices for her own health and happiness. She’s a strong woman.
If you can get your hands on a copy of I’m Glad My Mom Died, you should read it. If not, the audio version, read by McCurdy is a great option. It’s the non-fiction book of the season and definitely a pop-culture moment.
Side note, after finishing the book and doing a little internet digging about McCurdy, I discovered the book was originally a stage play that ran in Hollywood. I hope she reboots her play as i’d love to see it. Also, I had never seen her acting and watched a few clips. Specifically, I watched a bit of Sam & Cat, which she co-starred with Ariana Grande. The show is a cheesy comedy for kids and McCurdy is fine in her role, but Grande is shockingly unwatchable. I guess it’s different looking at it from the perspective of an adult, but I’m really glad that this show wasn’t on my step-kids radar when they visited us! Grande’s squeaky, babyish voice is going to haunt my nightmares.